Family therapy does not have to be an all-in intervention-style melodrama! Sometimes a few sessions can assist with revealing underlying deeper issues that play out in arguments, withdrawal or changes of behaviour. Once people feel heard and understood, they are more likely to negotiate changes that are needed.

What is family therapy?

Every family has an emotional inheritance, patterns of behaviour, spoken or unspoken rules, family schemas and family values. Family is a system and understanding the dynamics of the system including things such as boundaries (whether too rigid or flexible), different roles members play and the level of differentiation (the need for closeness and autonomy and how each member responds when under pressure) all has an influence.

A change in one area of the system has a flow-on affect to other areas in the system, which is why when even one member makes changes, it influences the entire system. The family system will work hard to maintain the familiar steady state, which is why we often feel stuck, replicating behaviour to maintain the familiar. Family therapy can disrupt the current unhealthy steady state to create a healthier steady state with new patterns of behaviour and communication.

Family therapy can take place between any combination of members – Mother/Father and teen; blended family members; siblings; and between members of extended family. Families go through changes and seasons and sometimes having a facilitated forum to talk things out by an objective ‘coach’ assists members to identify and express their concerns, needs and hurts in a mediated way.